... and checking it twice.
Some days I feel like little M and I are the best team in the world, and the two of us can accomplish whatever we set our minds to. Other days it feels like everything is unravelling and I'll never pick up a pencil again, or turn another page of a book, or fold another sock (not that I want to fold socks, but it has to be done, doesn't it?)
Today was a good day. I made a delivery of
to the Courtauld Gallery here in London for their Christmas displays while my mom watched little M. On my way home I popped by the post office to mail
It felt liberating to walk briskly through the snappy December air treading on the yellow leaves scattered on the sidewalk like golden coins.
Other days I can barely get out of bed or have a shower, as every waking moment is spent consoling my little inconsolable daughter. This is a big adjustment for everyone, including her. I imagine that from her perspective, life seems very overwhelming (it is for all of us, isn't it?). That's the thing about life; we don't choose life, it chooses us. We have to tense our legs and make the jump into the unknown whether we want to or not. We can't think about how far the drop might be, or where we'll land. We can only make the leap with the faith that everything will be ok. I'm telling that to little M every day... life is hard and overwhelming, but we're there for her every step of the way. She's survived the most difficult part, she made it here, now comes the fun of creating a wonderful, colourful, exuberant life. I can't wait to see how she shapes the world around her.
So that brings me to the last point on my list: enjoy Christmas. No matter what happens, or how difficult the day is with my little one, I'm determined to enjoy Christmas with every vibration in my soul. This is her first Christmas, and though she won't remember it, it is the beginning of a long chain of memories that we'll share together.
So with that in mind, I'm off to cuddle her and then sharpen a pencil and draw a few lines in my sketchbook.
What are your plans for the weekend?
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